When your children are little there is something beautiful about the smallness of life. We now live in a house with young adults ranging from 13-20. Each of them becoming their own person and wanting to be heard or left alone to BE. Christmas time used to be sweet and filled with expectation. Now there is a mixture of high expectations,, no expectations or a desire to do away with ritual all together.
I've been listening to a lot of my children's music, partly by choice. It is reminding me of a 60s rebirth. The emotion is strong. The futility of life, desire to be loved and wanting to do what will kill you so that you can feel alive are all part of the message. There are still the catchy happy songs mixed in. The rap music is intense and the rap I listen to has strong messages throughout the raw stories.
But look at our world. Their world. Fucked up, right? Places where in the past people have gone to for hope have let us down. Judgement, abuse, prejudice and corruption are everywhere. Turning against all that you have known is a part of finding your own way and making sense out of the mess before you. Deciding which anchors are safe and sure to hold our tossing ship is the hardest part.
I think many of us are looking inward. Not being introspective but seeing what is the light in us craving and allowing our light to move us. Without being told told how we are supposed to live but reaching for what is congruent to us and trusting ourselves. To me after years of being told how sinful I am, it has been an agonizing but beautiful process to trust myself again. To believe I have light in me.
The past has many good memories and I will choose to cherish them but I will also choose to close the door on "used to be's" and live in the realm of reality, shining my truth from within.
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